The funny Christmas Zodiac is here! Let’s see what you wrote Santa!
Santa got everyone’s letter and has revealed what each zodiac sign has asked for! Wow, we were simply shocked! Here’s your letter to Santa, according to the Funny Zodiac.
1. Aries
Dear Santa,
I’ve been good this year and I have evidence to prove it (Feel free to check my Facebook posts). Therefore, unless you want me to file a complaint, I’ll be expecting that unicorn under my Christmas tree. Don’t make me speak to your manager!
2. Taurus
Dear Santa,
If you’ll drop by on Christmas Eve, throw a quick load in the washer, dust a little, vacuum the carpets, and if you’re gonna eat the cookies, make sure you wash your plate.
3. Gemini
Dear Santa,
It’s hard to ask for something, considering I already have everything. So, how about a Ferrari? I don’t have one of those.
4. Cancer
Dear Santa,
All I want is to be able to eat as much as I want without getting fat. Thanks, old man!
5. Leo
Dear Santa,
You know what? You only work one day in the whole year and spend the rest of it criticizing us? You judgmental, fat bastard! Guess what! I’ve been naughty, and it was worth it!
6. Virgo
Dear Santa,
I’ve been good all year. OK, most of the time. Fine, just some times. Forget it. I’ll just buy my own gifts.
7. Libra
Dear Santa,
I’ll pay good money for the list of naughty people. I know I’m on it, but I want to see who else is there, so I can expand my group of friends.
8. Scorpio
Dear Santa,
All I want is a thin body and a fat bank account. And please don’t mix them up like you did last year.
9. Sagittarius
Dear Santa,
I have Rudolf. If you want to see him alive again, don’t do anything stupid. Just bring me one million dollars and a sexy body. No police involved, or the deer dies.
10. Capricorn
Dear Santa,
Just bring wine. (A LOT OF IT). I’ll be waiting.
11. Aquarius
Dear Santa,
Considering I stayed home this whole year, I was more than good. I was the best. And after the year I’ve had, I deserve to receive anything I want. One million dollars should do it.
12. Pisces
Dear Santa,
I’m not sure how much you know, but I’ve been good… for the last week or so. Let’s just focus on that. All I want is a self-cleaning house and wine. A lot of wine.
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