A Funny Guide To Sanitizing Everything

If you’re looking for a serious, complete guide to sanitizing everything, this is not it.

What I’ve done in 2020, you ask? I SANITIZED everything. I washed my hands, cleaned the house, and sanitized my body and spirit. After all these months of disinfecting everything, I’ve gained a lot of experience. So I’ve put together a guide for everyone!

Check it out below, and if it’s not too much to ask, share it with all your friends. Got any idea on this topic? Write your thoughts in the comments section.

1. Considering what we’re all going through, the responsible thing to do is always sanitize everything, including our drinks:

Funny meme: responsible man disinfects his drink against the coronavirus

2. Please note there’s a big difference between sanitizing the house and satanizing the house.

3. Experts said we should clean the house with alcohol, but I must say, after a bottle of wine, it’s really hard to get things done.

4. You can make your own sanitizer, but I don’t know how because every time I try it, I keep getting margaritas.

5. In times like these, you should be sanitizing your hands so often that when you pee, it cleans the toilet.

6. If it’s not germs you’re worried about, have in mind that every hand you shake has touched some genitals.

7. This may be a good time to invent a type of sanitizer for brains, to clean off the stupid.

8. I have once sanitized my hands after I got out of the shower, and I know I’m not the only one.

9. You must not touch anything without sanitizing your hands first, especially other people’s balls.

Funny meme: new rules at the bowling alley: don't touch other people's balls

10. It took a tiny, invisible virus and an apocalypse, but hand sanitizer finally became a socially acceptable birthday present.

11. To be safe from covid, your hands should consume more alcohol than your mouth.

12. This year, I sanitized my hands so much, I found the answers to my 8th-grade social studies test.

funny sanitizing meme: I washed my hands so many times, I found the answers to my 8th grade social studies test.

13. In these complicated times, we should all make an extra effort to stay safe. For example, I sanitize all my drinks with a little bit of alcohol, including my morning coffee and my tea.

14. To be 100% safe, sanitizing your hands isn’t enough. You must also disinfect your throat every ten minutes. Or five. Five’s better.

15. And once or twice a week, it’s best to have a more complex cleanse by drinking a ton of alcohol, which will disinfect your whole body + part of your soul.

16. They say we should disinfect the things we touch the most, but I highly recommend you don’t, because it’s going to burn.

17. After 2020, I guess we can all conclude that alcohol is, in fact, good for us.

18. Disinfecting your hands is just as important as avoiding to touch surfaces that are often touched by others, like door handles, handrails, or elevator buttons.

Funny elevator sign: do not click buttons with genitalia

19. Always wash your hands thoroughly. Like you’re washing Jason Momoa.

20. From now on, I’ll no longer be calling my evening activity ‘getting drunk,’ but ‘disinfecting my organism.’

If you enjoyed this funny article, check out some more awesome jokes and hilarious stories here.

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